Why is it that doing something for the first time always scares us so much?
Or is it just me?
Sometimes it’s even the first couple times that get you nervous. Those moments before you ground your feet and sit comfortably into your zone. I’m channelling my first-time anxieties as I begin to pen down what will be my first ever blog post.
... overcoming nervousness is about accepting that not everyone will love what you do and yet you do it anyway because it's what you love.
In reality, I’ve probably written loads of these things before.
Growing up as the youngest in the house, and the introvert amongst my outgoing and large family, it’s always been a little easier for me to write things down than it has been to convey my thoughts verbally. At times when life has felt a little overwhelming, I’ll grab a pen and some paper and doodle my thoughts. The addition of my first laptop at sixteen years old gave me someplace private to type and save these musings under random document names and hidden in the deepest crevices of an unusually titled folder.
It was actually the pen drive that still holds lots of the pieces I wrote as a teen that inspired me to start blogging some of my current thoughts and experiences. Uncovering my old diary, poetry and story-writing hit me with a wave of nostalgia too sweet to ignore. My love for reading has always encouraged me to use writing in interesting ways to tell a story. And there probably is no story more exciting than one where neither the author nor the readers have any idea of what the next chapters hold.
Honestly, somewhere caught in the middle of my first-time fears is a deep child-like excitement.
I’m excited to start writing again.
University took it’s toll on my creativity and forced me to conform to a certain set of writing standards. While I obviously appreciate the lessons I’ve learnt from this, it definitely has not silenced the voice within. My hope is that along this journey I’ll end up getting to know that voice a little better and that ultimately I’lll end up writing things that people will enjoy reading.
Secondly, I’m so excited to build a platform for other young women (and men, everyone’s welcome here) to relate to, to interact with, and to use to grow one-another. I know I still have so much to learn myself, and I can’t wait to see how committing to creating content for this blog helps that to happen.
But thirdly, and maybe if I’m honest with myself, most importantly there’s the issue of facing my first-time fears head on. Without doubt, many will find my style of writing a bit different and my humour at times may contain a level of wit reserved for a select few, but overcoming nervousness is about accepting that not everyone will love what you do and yet you do it anyway because it’s what you love.
Being true to myself is a great place to start in my journey to get to know my writing voice better, so I will be unapologetically individual in this space (sorry not sorry!). And I know that it isn’t always as easy as just saying the words once… so if that isn’t enough to kick my first-time fears to the kerb, well, practice makes perfect.
I’ll just have to keep doing it until I get better.
(sorry not sorry!)